MARI MELABUR DENGAN SSPN-i PLUS!

Friday, March 26, 2010

RM 50

50 MYR doesn't really last more than a week at this age.
baru rase cam semalam cucuk kt mesin atm, haish tetibe da tinggal 30?
ade yg teruk tu bila dh sampai mall, 50 mcm 10. pastu bila turun rapid,kt kolej mcm nk bli topup lak. dh 10 hengget melayang..(topup lak kena tolak 2 hengget pasal wat request).hahahaha..

lunch kt KB skang ni mahal beb. Dulu I mamam RM3.50 plg mahal. Skang more than RM4 tau. (Mana taknye dok makan ikan bakar jek.hahah).salahkah aku? ikan2 tu sgt menggoda beb...tempat yg I slalu lunch ngn member2 Elite tu lah faveret I stakat ni. Erm lg 1 tempat besh dan murah..Canselori. Sedddappp.pilihan banyak. tak mcm 1 cafe kt Za'ba ni, dah dekat 2 taon i duduk cni..makanan tetap sama,malah kedudukan serving pun xberubah langsung.haih..agaknye bos dorg ni mmg xsukakan perubahan kowt.
kamonla...dua taon mengadap mende sama xbosan ke?? dulu mmg slalu tapau ctu,skang ni tgk makanan kt ctu pun i xde nafsu.huuuu..

Skang ni I kena betul2 berjimat. Sebelum ni x aware pun pasal perbelanjaan ni. Slalu ikut hati jer.Ikut sedap selera.Xlama lg nk kerja.haaaa mase tula br tau susah payah cari duit kn..

pesanan penaja:berjimatcermatlahkamusebelomkamudijimatkan.ahahahaha!

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

tekak sakit..
kepala pening..
tulang rase sengal..
tdo mlm 2 3 jam jek.
ayah...nk balik..
duduk cni suma org nk blasah kite..
torture emosi kte..





pewut lapa...
sapela nk hidangkan makanan tuk i ni..
time cmni teringat blueberry cheese cake, kt kafe za'ba
cheese tart die pun sgt menggoda..

azmel ni ajak mcD saje je kan..
smlm da mamam fastfood
xkan hri ni nk bantai fastfood lg?
kalau pekena ikan bakar Ube catering okey gak.(kt KB UKM)

aduh...pening kepala lg..
terpaksa baring2 ngn teddy sj hari ni.esok la g mkn...

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

semalam saya dh ckp,
kalau buat discussion lepas lecture 2 jam tu,mmg xboleh dtg.pg ada kelas. 2-4pm lecture.then nk sambung groupwork lg? no way!sebab? i've got 3 hours physical training that night. tolongla faham..dr awal lg dh bg tau..buatla discussion bila2 anda suma suka, but not monday n wednesday nite.
training dh mmg teruk kena blasah then kena balik jalan kaki ke za'ba.ye, sy ulangi jalan kaki balik za'ba. anda suma warga ukm atau yang penah tau jarak dr padang taqraw ke za'ba akan tau betapa azabnye kami waktu pulang.

isnin petang mmg saya xdatang lecture terus, dan of course gagal hadir group discussion. then malam pun xdatang training coz mmg xlarat sgt. these few days i've gone through chronic sleeplessness nights. backpain, headache, n tummy pun xselesa.
sy sungguh xsuka bila dipaksa buat sesuatu diluar minat dan kesungguhan. but for the sake of another group members, I'm always willing to offer the best that I can give.


yet someone had thrown harsh words to me this afternoon.
someone yg penah aku hormat, puji depan kawan2, and admire as a good leader in UKM.

sangat mengguris perasaan. aku xpenah tolak kalau nk bg task untuk group project.
tp ayat die tu bunyi mcm ckp aku ni xnk buat kerja langsung. satu tuduhan yg amat berat untuk diterima pakai.

sebelum ni penah nk buat discussion mlm jumaat.aku okey je. pastu dorg plak cancel. then, ni kali kedua nk berjumpa, bila aku xdapat dtg, tetiba kena sound plak. bnyak cantek muka ko! bukan aku xbg tau xboleh dtg.siang2 lg dh ckp, xlarat sbb mlm ade training!!!! bodo!!!!!!!!!! nama je pengerusi.tp ...(hai mls nk mencarut lg. kedut2 mata i nti).

hajat hati nk sound balik, tp xpelah, dr membazir kedit ckp ngn org xpaham bhsa baik telefon mak ayah kt umah.

seb baik pas lecture g sambut birthday kt town(haha town la sgt)
lantak la pasal die tu xmahu pk lg. buang masa je.

saya okey kawan2, bila saya xpuas hati saya luahkan cukup2 dan cuba maafkan.
i tell u wat, kalau nk buat marah saya hilang serta merta bawak la g makan2 atau main buaian.hehe.
skarang ni umur saya dh 22 tahun.
tima kaseh pada bonda dan ayahanda tercinta, I wouldn't make it if you two hadn't been there for me.

hari ni perasaan kecewa dan sakit hati telah dapat digantikan dgn kegembiraan yg tiada nilai. tima kasih kpd pihak penganjur, cik ziha, cik husna kerana hadiah yg sgt comel..then kepada suma yg hadir td..cik yatie, cik ziela, cik sharon, cik nadhrah,cik tiqah dan cik maissarrah..bersama kamu semua telah membuat pipiku penat untuk ketawa. terlupa sekejap ada timbunan project sedang menunggu di bilik.

okey skang sila tutup fb dan buka file thesis. senyum dan mulakan memegang pen dan buku catatan. jangan! jangan cuba2 nk buka page fb lg..kerana confirm anda akan terus xsedar diri lalu melupakan tesis..kecian dia..xde yg sanggup luangkan masa dgn die..hehe

tiada harapan yg pasti buat kita..

tak tahu
tak pasti
keliru
kecewa
marah
bosan
benci
rindu dan cinta
semua telah kalah

Monday, March 22, 2010

kenapa?

dunia ini sungguh bosan.
hari-hari kita perlu lakukan sesuatu yang membosankan.
sesuatu diluar minat dan kesungguhan.

sekejap ketawa,lepas tu sedih
sekejap rindu, lepas tu benci


i need a vacation mungkin?
di tempat yg sejuk, bersama yg tersayang.

again, who is that tersayang?
i think i'm ready to let u go

but i don't know if there is another people who will
love me the way u are.
i'm crying inside and nobody knows

Saturday, March 20, 2010

emosi terganggu

RAHMAT / EKAMATRA --
~Di sini kasih ku abadi~


Di sini hati ku terluka
Setelah kasih ku berbunga
Sungguh tak ku sangka

Tiada lagi airmata
Hendak ku tangiskan untuk mu
Yang tinggal hanyalah
Duka dan pilu

Di mana harum mawar yang setia
Di mana hilangnya kubu cinta
Sukarnya berpisah dengan diri mu
Sukarnya melupakan oh dirimu

Jangan kau tinggalkan diri ku
Jangan kau berpaling kasih mu
Jangan kau biarkan diri ku
Sepi tanpa mu

Sayangku kembalilah pada ku
Tiada tempat untuk mengadu
Sayangku berikanlah kasih mu
Buat diri ku

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Go Green!..



This coming saturday, 20th Mac (Happy becoming birthday cik Husna!) I'll be going to Jalan Sg Panjang, Sg Besar Selangor. There will be a marcotting and wildlings collection exercise in conjunction with World Forestry Day Celebrations, 2010. This is the first time I'm involving myself with such a volunteer program and yet I can barely wait to see what's happening there. The green nature inside me is going to be so excited and alive. All this while I've gone through hard times when I do things that are out of my passion. I've done many things half-heartedly or no heart at all for the sake of a degree or other people that matter most, my parents. This time around, I wish I could have so much fun and meet new people with new environment.

On Friday, I'll be out to Kajang in order to find a nice pair of gloves and maybe sunblock cream. and I need hat too!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

my acer and Hafiz

dan manusia perlu bersabar, i mean sgt bersabar.

Khamis lepas my acer tiba2 shutdown tanpa notis. Oh, panik. I tried to calm down, take a deep breath and press the power button. At the first few seconds I believe there's nothing wrong because the green light appear,that's mean it can be power-on as usual. And then suddenly the acer shutdown again. Three times attempt and it keeps on being dead.Damn. The worst nightmare seems to become real. The next day and after the next day the acer had been my helpless company. Okey, this is the best time to breakdown honey, since I am running out of money, and I didn't even paid for PPBL's prep and convo's lamination fees and... and...

I hate asking for money, even from my parents or my sister or my brother. But I've got no choice. The repairing must cost me a fortune. Otherwise I have to rob a bank or at least rob that Kedai Adam uphill. I know that mak cik got a loot of money because she sells everything double the price compared to Giant.

Gloomy, annoyed and distress
.
That would definitely describe my weekend and Mournful Monday. It was mournful because after a few effort done to reach out the sponsor for a repairing service, my heart sank. A visit to a repairing shop--Pusanika make it even worst. 380 MYR. No, it couldn't be that much..

During this hardtime I realized, No one could offer me something that I needed most, a moral support. I need hugs. I need someone to kiss away my tears.

Nevertheless I keep on reminding myself, somehow or someday I'll get through this. There is something He want me to see and be grateful for.
but the painful journey to that someday is killing me....

Thank God He heard me.Yesterday before I go to bed I wished somehow tomorrow morning I'll wake up in heaven. So do I.
After a visit to the library at 1:30 p.m, I went down at Aminuddin's bustop. Waiting for Rapid or 6Z, I've planned to runaway from UKM. To find peace. To make me feel better. Then only I saw my saviour's flyer.. A Uniten's programmer, Hafiz. I text him rightaway. At 3 p.m he's already waiting at the parking lot at Za'ba. I gave him my acer and he left. 6 hours later he gave me a call. I got my acer back and he charge me 125 MYR. What? I saved 255 MYR???!

thank you mommy, daddy
I wouldn't make it if you two hadn't be there for me.

Monday, March 8, 2010

They need volunteers..


Love our mother nature..

A few minutes visit can make a big difference into your life.

see you there!

MAMPAN dan Remaja

Program mmg best, nasihat saya remaja skarang kena lebih banyak dgr ceramah daripada tokoh2 intelek negara. Perlu kurangkan masa berfoya-foya, tak kisahla dgn facebook ataupun dgn boyfriend/girlfriend. Sebab saya yakin, keluar berdating banyak buruk dari baiknya. X setuju? saya boleh berikan sebab kenapa saya berkata sedemikian;

okey pertama, duit habis; tambang komuter/minyak kereta, tol, tgk wayang, makan fastfood, main bowling, shopping dan etc. Bila tiba masa bayar duit buku, buat projek, pandai pulak ckp no money..dgn mulut muncung xpuas hati(bayar buku sama harga dgn tiket wayang)

Kedua, pergaulan bebas. Hmm isu ni sensitif sbb kalau saya ulas banyak2 mesti ada yang kata'eleh mcm la kau tu baik sgt'. ok,fine. But I can't help myself from cursing those 'loving couples' yg sungguh xmalu dan xtau jaga maruah agama. Pakai tudung tp peluk2 sakan dalam train? WTH?!Euuu sungguh meluat.Macam la kau sorg ade kekaseh. Then mula lah kecoh dlm berita buang bayi sana sini.

Ketiga
Melalaikan. Hmm..Bila dh ralit ngn kekaseh, masing2 lupa tanggungjawab yg lebih besar,lebih utama, kepada pencipta kita semua. 'Tp x semua org mcm tu'. Bila difikirkan balik, bab solat tak tinggal, tp pegang tgn kekaseh bukan main erat,siap peluk pinggang lg. Mcm org baru kawin..Malah lebih...

Saya tau saya bukanlah org yg layak nk komen mende2 mcm kt atas tu.Hak masing2 nk tentukan bagaimana cara hidup yg anda pilih. cuma waktu ni hati terdetik untuk luahkan rasa hati. Setiap hari melihat kepincangan yg berlaku dikalangan bakal pemimpin negara. Saya sendiri sedang dalam proses memperbaiki kelemahan diri. Saya pun buat salah, dan perlu sentiasa mengingatkan diri sendiri.
********
Program anjuran Mahasiswa Anak2 Pahang siang td amat menarik dan bermanfaat. Input yg diberikan adalah berbentuk motivasi yang disampaikan dlm bentuk yg berkesan dan mesra alam. Xdapat saya huraikan panjang disini,maaf. Semuanya save dlm otak dan sekarang operation da semakin slow kerana mengantuk.Jadi sebelum mengakhiri entri ini, saya nk hidangkan pembaca semua(kalau ada) dgn gambar2 yg sempat diambil sebelum kamera kesayangan habis bateri.huhu


Tunggu bas yg dijanjikan pukul 7 pg..pukul 8:30 bru nas sampai..

Waktu ni baru sampai MMU
perghhh penat jalan.tp bila ada mamarazi terus senyum lebar mereka ni..
mila and ayin(warga johor yg dipaksa join program =p)



saye..dan mila..kami pinky girls

Saturday, March 6, 2010

A gift for a friend..


Last 3rd march was my friend's birthday. A good friend from my secondary school who I suddenly realized that we've known each other for almost ten years. yeah,ten years, starting from form 1 (2001) till now, 2010.

I'm sorry for not inviting u guys..especially kwn2 Elit yg teringin nk mamam spagheti saya..hehe. Last minute punye plan, the idea had just pop out like that after a short phone call he made (to ensure I'm aware of his big day,haha). It's already late when I took the bus to Kajang and bought the ingredients at Giant.

Thank God one of our friend is very kind to let me use her so-called-kitchen. She got a damn gorgeous room, which I really had fall head over heels. Mcm resort, they had a nice balcony (bgn pg the first thing I did was standing there and breath the fresh air,looking at those heart-warming pinky kemboja.) Sgt jeles dgn her place. And I managed to mess them up and come back to my little nest the next morning.

I don't know y, mase tgh prepare the meals I felt very excited and happy and calm and motivated, as if I've done a very big thing that could have changed my life forever. haha,exaggerated. Mesti seronok kan, ada seorang kwan yg masakkan untuk kita..and I think this is far better than donating ur money to buy secret recipes' cake or Domino's or Carls Jr. or whichever u guys 'love' a lot. What I'm trying to do here is giving the sense of esthetical value into a friendship. Money is not everything, we all know that but people now are becoming anxious to spend more to show 'more love' to the one we care.


to my friends who read this, I hope we can find one fine day to get together and cook for ourselves.

tomorrow I've got a perhimpunan Mahasiswa Pahang from all IPTA/IPTS at MMU cyberjaya. Hopefully it will be another great day for us. Till then, bubbye!

~Life is beautiful, in a sense that it covers a lot of painful experiences, enjoyable moments and something that we could never expected to happen. After all, those pains will likely open up other chances of happiness, even in the most little things that we never ever notice before~

Friday, March 5, 2010

Percy?

This is Percy , the one that I've picked up from za'ba, it has travelled for 5 hours in the bus with me, and eventually we landed up safely at home. It tooks time to grow but thanks to mom who take good care of this plant while I'm away at uni. Once in a month(s) I'll go home for a holiday and never forget to check out it's growth.
This plant had actually reminds me of my childhood.
I used to love gardening so much and I've spent most of my time with flowers instead of playing like other kids. Watching my mom planting vegetable seeds and watering them twice a day is a wonderful feeling that I could never found in other things. The most interesting part is when we harvest the cucumbers, eggplants, okras and long beans. Dad will take part in harder task, growing banana trees as well as papayas.
Cycling and playing with colorful plasticine are fun, but with those green things I feel more connected, (with nature). At that time, talking to orchids is one of the best therapy, especially after I had a fistfight with my grumpy big brother.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

good news n bad news

for the good news, click here

the bad news is, i need help with an ipod. last 2 days my brother had plugged the tiny thing to my laptop, which already vulnerable with viruses inside. a few hours later he came to me with a pale face. i know something bad had happened. uwaaaaa...the problem is, the green thing had a firmware damaged and i need to restore it using i-tunes. guess wat i failed miserably. somebody pls help coz i dont hv much time to go for a repairing service.

Monday, March 1, 2010

3 tahun dulu..

aku naik bas dgn sedeh hati, meninggalkan keluarga..tuk belajar di matrik Gambang. menempuh 3 jam perjalanan dgn penuh kesayuan. kenapa mesti belajar jauh2? tinggalkan family sume? kenapa perlu hadapi kepayahan sorg2? kenapa perit sgt perasaan yg ditanggung ni? kenapa..kenapa..dan KENAPA...
sebelum belajar di matrik, lima tahun aku habiskan kt semsas, .yg tu xpayah ckp r..setahun pertama mcm nk bunuh diri.walaupun xkena buli, aku cukup menyampah dgn senior. oh..kena basuh baju sendiri. iron baju sendiri. polish kasut sendiri.kemas loker.kemas dorm.basuh tray sendiri.eh basuh cawan jer-okey,kami makan dlm tray,bukan pinggan tau. peraturan itu dan ini. semuanya terlalu baru dan asing. memori tu suma kalau nk letak kt cni..88 mlm 89 hari pun x abis.

skang bebalik kpd cerita untuk menaiki bas.ya, bas. untuk ke kuantan, aku kena naik bas sri jengka, yg men ambik je penumpang,sumbat sampai tangga.
duduk asrama mana boleh balik rumah sesuka hati. kena isi kad balik bermalam, kumpul 1 kelas,bg kt warden bertugas. mase nk keluar pagar kena benti kt postguard, tulis nama dalam buku rekod ikut form. then bermulalah perjalanan yg sungguh meletihkan.

dua hari je duk rumah..xbnyak yg boleh dibuat.belum habis melepas rindu kt family, dh kena balik asrama. part ni yg plg sedih..waktu menaip ni pun aku rasa air mata ni bergenang...

(kad balik bermalam kena mintak signature ayah. ayah i sempoi, die suh i sign sendiri jek.)

waktu nak bersalam ngn parents tu yg xtahan. sedihnye xboleh nk digambarkan. aku jeles ngn adik2, yg xperlu jd mcm aku, travel ke tempat org,hadapi semuanya dgn keterpaksaan. aku xpernah berenggang ngn mak..jd bila dh masuk asrama, ohhh sukarnya hidup. pernah sekali aku berhasrat nk call mak, pergila ke public phone tepi dewan makan. rindu punya pasal, dapat dgr suara pun jadila. bila mak jawab panggilan tu, aku diam. xboleh nk berkata walau sepatah pun.sebak sgt. 2 3 minit aku diam je.
pastu aku kuatkan semangat, aku ckp.."helo mak..adik ni..rindu."..
pastu hujan pun turun dgn lebatnye. aku tahan, tutup mulut supaya mak xdgr aku teresak-esak. kami diam,xckp apa-apa. gagang telefon tu dah basah. duit syiling pun dh nak abis. sempat ckp bbrapa minit je lepas tu. suara mak pun lain, aku tau mak pun sedih. :(

kelas bahasa melayu pertama aku dgn cikgu Asmui, merangkap ayah kawan baik aku; Fatiehah. Benda pertama yg die suh kitorg tulis, aku igt tajuk die sampai skarang:
"Hari pertama saya di SEMSAS"
Aku gagal kawal emosi. Baru tulis beberapa perkataan, aku dah sebak. basah kertas karangan aku. Afiqah cuba pujuk, oh lagi lebatla hujan turun.


Hmm..itulah pengalaman. Skarang aku tahu apa gunanya kisah duka tu suma. Tuhan jadikan aku seorang yg empathy..

Adik aku, yani skang blajar kt matrik. tempat aku dulu. bila aku pandang die, tlg kemas barang2 die..sayu jgk hati ni. kesian adik..nak x nak mesti ada jgk perasaan yg aku rasa dulu. rasa xnk balik kolej. rasa xnk keluar rumah.

Aku cuma mampu berdoa, semoga tuhan tabahkan hati kami, semoga perjalanan untuk menimba ilmu ni dipermudahkan.Amin.